Gowin Family Blog

After writing the post about Erin’s efforts in the lemonade business, I ran across a contest hosted by Inc magazine. In short, kids from all over the country are eligible to write about their experiences selling lemonade. Prizes, including a $1000 savings bond, are at stake. Tell your friends and family to…
Vote for Erin!

Today I (Suzanne) was coloring with Erin and Liam, and Erin was frustrated that her page wasn’t looking as good as mine. I told her that the main difference was that she was doing it very quickly and that I was taking my time. I reminded her of the Col. 3:23 verse: “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men.” We took that time to talk about how we should try to do our best at everything we do, like we were coloring for the Lord, not just to show off to others. We said the verse a couple times and Erin expounded on it—talking of other instances where we try to do our best, not just to show off for others. I could see she was “getting it.”

A few minutes later, Liam and I finished the picture we were doing together and he asked, “Mom, can we keep this picture forever and ever till we are dead?” “Why, Buddy?” “Because I want to give it to Jesus when I die.”

Most mornings follow a predictable pattern:

1. Liam gets up (6:15-6:30)
2. Liam walks into our room, goes to Suzanne’s side of the bed.
3. Asks, “Mom, can I watch TV?”
4. Response: “Go to the bathroom and then you can watch TV.”
5. Liam heads downstairs, does his bathroom business, turns on the TV.

Nearly every day is like this. Exceptions occur rarely, and mostly because something else is going on–like we need to go somewhere and we’re up earlier than usual. But, again, this doesn’t happen often.

Today should have been like any other day.

For some reason, today was different.

I was lying awake in bed when Liam got up, and he didn’t come into our room. Not typical. Instead, he was poised at the top of the stairs. He appeared to be thinking about what to do next.

“What are you doing, Bud?” I ask.

He walks into the room, over to my side of the bed.

“Dad, can we eat breakfast together, you and me?”

I’m groggy, puzzled. “Why do you want to do that?”

“‘Cause sometimes we do that. Can we, Dad?”

What am I going to say? No?

“Sure, Bud. We’ll have breakfast together. You and me.”

Before Suzanne and I had children, I swore that we would have no Barbies in our house. Our girls didn’t need to have their identities influenced by that materialistic, narcissistic bombshell and her ilk. They’d get plenty of that drama in real life so they didn’t need it intermingled with their play as well.

Fast forward to six years later and I’ve got a house full of Barbies and Disney princesses. How did this happen?

Here’s one explanation: girls have been made to be beautiful and creative, thus they love anything that speaks to those innate desires. This is the angle that John Eldredge takes in his book Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul (I have referred to this as The Woman Book, in contrast to Eldredge’s first book Wild at Heart, to which I refer as The Man Book). Erin and her girlfriends often play “dress up,” putting on princess gowns, jewelry, and high heels (well, high for little girls). When Erin gets dressed for school or church, she’ll often ask, “How do I look, Dad?” or “Do I look pretty?” Sometimes she’ll ask Liam the same question and she gets upset when he says “no.” We explain that he doesn’t really mean that she’s not pretty, he’s just being a button-pushing little brother. Behind all this, Eldredge says, is the desire for a woman to know she is lovely. Proverbs 31 anyone?

At the same time, Liam keeps wanting to demonstrate his strength. He’ll pick up something and ask us to watch him do it. He’ll ask if me if I think he’s strong, and he’ll ask me if I’m strong enough to pick up certain objects. Just today we were doing some errands around town and stopped at the insurance agent’s office. There were some five-gallon water bottles on the floor. After considering them for a minute, Liam asked, “Can you pick those up, Dad?” I suppose so, I said. “Can you?” Well, not right now. “Why?” (Aside: always “why?”) Because I’m holding your baby sister right now (see, I’m already demonstrating my strength).

In The Man Book, Eldredge claims that a central question in a man’s life is, “Do I have what it takes?” Am I powerful, am I capable, am I competent? This, I think, is what Liam is beginning to explore at his almost four years of age.

So this is what Suzanne and I are trying to do, raise beautiful girls and strong boys who recognize that it is their Creator who makes them so. God help us.